Reinventing

Change means reinvention. Each time a major event happens in our lives—leaving a job or a relationship, moving, losing a loved one—we have to take control of who we will become or risk never reaching our full potential.

Change is difficult, change is frightening, change is uneasy, but change can be made, it can be made. I do know this.

When faced with change, no matter the reason, we must first look inward.  Looking inward isn't always easy.  Perhaps we don't like what we see.  Major life events are an opportunity to become a better person, to become the person we were meant to be.  I do not believe we can reinvent ourselves before we recognize and accept our grief and the reason for our grief.  Grieving doesn't only happen when we lose a loved one to death, it occurs when we divorce, lose a relationship, lose a job, our children growing up and leaving, an injury that limits us....all create grief.  All create an opportunity.

Recognizing the feelings for what they are may be the most difficult as it is not always obvious.

A 5 1/2 year reinvention has been a part of my life since Steve died.  The process was halted or crippled at times as I lost other significant people in my life.  The reinvention is still in process but I can feel it, I can see it, I am living it.  

“Our sorrows and wounds are healed only when we touch them with compassion.” ~Buddha~

My sorrows and wounds are healed, newly scarred but healed.  I have recognized and accepted my wounds, I have faced my sorrow, I have made peace with my loss.  I have traveled a dark, lonely road but there was always a tiny glimmer, now that glimmer is more, much more.  I count myself as blessed; I have a large and loving family and a circle of kind, compassionate friends.  I have been told by several of my nieces that they aspire to be like me...that is an honor, high praise.  I have never been so honored.  

“I have done my best. That is all the philosophy of living one needs.” ~Lin-yutang

I HAVE done my best, I know this.  My philosophy on life has changed since October 9, 2007.  I don't always live up to this philosophy but I aspire to it every day, I don't forget it.  

“If pleasures are greatest in anticipation, just remember that this is also true of troubles.” ~Elbert Hubbard

I surround myself with people I love, people I admire, people who are good.  I shy away from toxic people, that is easier said than done but I try.  I have learned that the best thing we can do is to give, to care, to love and empower others.  I open my mind to change, I open my mind to the ideas of others.  I don't have to agree with others but I listen and I accept their belief.

I have entered kinder and gentler times.  I like it here.  I don't forget, I simply move on.....remembering. I don't regret.....I remember the good and the bad.  I grow from this remembering.

Day 46 or 365.

Be kind to yourself......K